If you've ever read my blog before, you'll know that I'm at work a lot. Like most people, I'm at work more than I am anywhere else. Much longer than I am at home and much longer than I am out with family or friends. I am usually at work for 90% of my day, sometimes more as was the case last night. When I'm not at work I'm often thinking of work or talking about work. It's a vicious cycle.
I find that, no matter where I've worked, there gets to be a point where my work life and my social life kind of blend together as one. I'm at this point right now. I get along great with the people I work with. We all work very well together and I like being at work because I get to hang out with friends. We have lunch together, we exchange biting emails, and we often hang out after work. It's fun. They're a great group of people.
There's a point here somewhere and that point is, work relationships are unlike any other. You tend to form close bonds with people you work with who, in any other circumstance, you would never have been friends with. Now don't get me wrong, I love all my work friends and I really enjoy hanging out with them but I know that if I had met some of them in some other way we would likely not be as close. And I know that if I quit my job, the majority of us would drift apart.
It's sort of like high school. You're with the same people all day. You hang out at night and you all have the same thing in common. There is never nothing to talk about. No matter how hard you try not to, the conversation will always sneak back to something work related. And it's with those people who you can carry on a non-work related conversation that you will likely keep in touch with after you leave. But that's ok. It's not a bad thing. It's all part of the Work Relationship. It's because of that commonality that you can become so close. Who else understands what it means to get a shitty sound mix? Only those who work with you. Your friends/family/husband/wife will try to give you their best sympathetic look(maybe)but no one can really understand how a shitty sound mix can mess up your day other than those you work with. When you have to work really late or pull a graveyard shift and you go home looking for sympathy you likely won't find it. A spouse's reaction is usually that of irritation or anger that you're not with them. They usually don't understand that you'd rather be. But, guaranteed, if you come to work the next day and throw out that you were there until 9:30PM the night before, you will be met with exactly the reaction you're looking for. Because they know what it's like. They know how much it sucks.
I once read that the majority of affairs, both male and female, are had with fellow employees and if you've ever had a full time job it's so easy to see why this is true. Now please don't read into this that I'm thinking of having an affair because I obviously am not but think about it: Let's say you've hit that point in your marriage where it kind of plateaus. Both you and your spouse work, your lives follow the same pattern every day and when you do finally get to see each other you're both too tired to do anything.(Again, I'm not talking about myself...Mom.....) Let's throw into the mix that you have been having a horrible time at work and your endless complaints to your husband or wife are falling on deaf ears. Who else do you turn to but a co-worker? He/she totally understands what you're going through and is more than willing to let you bitch in exchange for you letting them do the same. It's easy to see how a different kind of relationship could develop. You're finding the sympathy that you desperately wanted from your spouse. A spouse who couldn't possibly give you the sympathy that your looking for. Another vicious cycle.
I find it interesting is all. It's like living in some freakish social vacuum.
I can't wait for the rumors to start circulating around work that I'm having an affair.
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6 comments:
I totally hear you, I've been in exactly the same situation. It's so hard NOT to sleep with the people I spend the most time with, you know, the members of my Dungeons and Dragons Club. There's nothing hotter than a level 2 wizard.
Hey! We promised never to speak of that again. And I'm a level 3 wizard now thank you very much.
If I give you 2 a video camera would you tape your next nude "melee"? I could make a ton of money from it on the internet.
Did anyone actually read the post? It was thought provoking people! Jeeze. I'm going to go back to complaining about things.
I can see how that would happen. It must be particularly treacherous when you're stressed, tired, upset, and therefore not of particularly sound mind or best judgment.
Not that I'm talking from personal experience. Or anything.
Ahem.
I think it is vitally important to have work friends, but also to know that you might not have been friends otherwise. There is something about people you work with that creates a common bond. In my case, the people who work with me are much like me and are drawn to the work for that reason. It's nice. Much easier than meeting friends the old fashion way - you know, by talking to strangers. Bah, strangers.
Also, I heard someone say once that if you are married, it is really important not to complain about your spouse to close work friends of the opposite sex b/c it does tend to lead to leaning on them rather than your spouse. I figured that was probably right, but I've never tested the theory having never been married.
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