Dear New Kids on the Block,
I really hope that you don't think people are coming to your concerts because your reunification has given birth to an awesome new boy band. We're only coming to relive our high school crushes. And because it's funny. Very funny.
Please don't be disappointed.
Dear Canker worms,
Please stop living. I think the time of living should be over for you now. I don't like you. Please stop sticking to my car and hitting me in the face when I walk out of the door. My neighbours already think I'm weird.
Love and kisses,
Dear person who finds my house key,
My dog decided that he no longer wanted to walk which sort of hindered my ability to continue to search for the key I somehow lost while walking him. You may have seen my dragging his lifeless body down the sidewalk in an effort to make him stand erect. You may have also heard me swearing. Please put the key in the mailbox. Watch out for worms.