The tale in which my friend and I go to the movies and realize we're old ladies

My friend T's sister, thinking she would love the movie, decided to buy multiple tickets to Twilight. Turns out she hated it. Thus, 2 tickets became ours. I had not read the Twilight books, nor was I planning on going to the movie, but in an effort to try to get off my ass and stop watching TV, I decided what the hell, and away we went.

We arrived at the theatre 30 minutes early to find it pulsating with teenage girls. Thankfully there wasn't a line up at the ticket counter so we breezed right in through the doors and then back out again to wait in the line to get into the actual theatre because it was basically so long it was outside. Did I mention there were 800 teenage girls?

T: We seem to be the oldest people here.
Me: It does seem that way doesn't it.
T: We could just pretend we're someone's mom.
Me: We could easily be anyone's mom here.
T: Oh, I know her! She's on my basketball team! See? We're not the only...oh wait....she's with her kids.
Me: Ok, let's revise our status to the oldest women here without kids. Let's just pretend we're here with our kids and we're cool moms so we're letting them pretend they're here by themselves.
T: Done. Next time we go out though I'm going to bring my Ipod so I don't have to actually have a conversation with you.
Me: That's ok. I'll be too busy texting my other friends.

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T: Do you think we're in the right line? It's 9:30 and they haven't let anyone in yet.
Me: This has to be the right line. It says on the board 7:30 and 9:30 so this has to be the right line.

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T: What did that girl say? Did she just say we're in the 9:50 line?
Me: Shit.

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Me: I don't think there are any seats left.
T: We're going to have to sit in the ones at the very front.
Me: Hell no.
T: I think they're the only ones left.

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Me: These are really close.
T: The faces are actually distorted.
Me: I think I'm going to need a Gravol.
T: Ha!
Me: Seriously. Do you have any Gravol? I'm already nauseous.

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Me: How do those seats even exist? Under no circumstances would those ever be favourable seats. To anyone. Why are they even there?
T: I really would rather have sat on the floor.
Me: I can't straighten my neck.
T: I'm sure going to feel this tomorrow.
Me: It's way past my bedtime.

For what it was worth, I actually did like the movie. And, on the positive side, we were quite far from the teenage girls who laughed at really inappropriate times.

My neck still hurts though.