Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Just when you least expect it: BAM! Uncomfortable.

Sometimes I think, yeah, I could totally have kids and then sometimes, I'm sitting in the doctors office and there are six kids in there all running around and yelling and sneezing snot into their laps and ramming trucks into people's feet and I actually start looking forward to the pap smear because it has to be better then listening to every parent trying very loudly to out parent all the other parents and then I think that I don't want any part of this ever in my whole life and maybe never having sex is actually a good thing because what if all this happened by accident? And so I actually consider asking the doctor to, while she's down there, maybe accidentally puncture an ovary or something just in case. But then I don't because that probably would have been really painful.

** ** **

I'm not even going to comment on the Rider's heartbreaking loss because I'm still crying. I will, however, say that if you don't watch sports and don't have a favorite team who you cheer for no matter what happens, you will never ever understand what it means to be a Rider fan and you will never ever understand how upsetting it is when your team loses. So, maybe, because this is something you won't ever understand, maybe stop making jokes about how much the Riders suck and how funny it is that they lost. Or maybe try to at least learn the rules of the game. Or actually watch a game. It might make your clever digs more credible.

Also, the Riders still kick ass so everyone should just deal with that.

5 comments:

May-B said...

Sometimes after a long day at work, I want to rip my womb out through my belly button with a crochet hook.

And you're right. Riders kick ass. Always.

Imnotbenny said...

I've never wanted to rip anything out of my body with a crochet hook- MayB is much tougher than me.

I'm with you on the hot/cold kid thing. I like the idea of having kids someday, but then I remember that I like peace and quiet and organization and freedom, and don't like crazy midgets. Kids are kind of like crazy midgets.

May-B said...

Dude, you lie. You would LOVE a crazy midget.

Imnotbenny said...

That's actually kind of true.

tee said...

And can I just say how tired I am of people ragging on Saskatchewan fans? There is absolutely nothing more fun than being a Rider fan so just shut up already Calgary...or whoever...especially on Labour Day...although maybe not so much the day after...ahem...Queen of Labour Day...ahem...