Christmas memories

Every Sunday I go to my parent's house for supper. Last night, after the meal, we decorated Christmas cookies. Here are some of the highlights:

• My mom had just put out all her Christmas decorations and, being extremely resistant to change, refused to adjust for there now being a dog in the house. So, rather than Christmas carols, we all joined in a chorus of "Rider no! Rider, stop that! Rider don't eat that cotton!" Fa la la la la.

• My mom, similar to myself but not quite as much, likes to express herself by cursing. My dad has taken it upon himself to curb one of my mom's natural impulses. He tried it with me but I just chose to pretend I didn't understand what he was doing:

Me: Shit!

Dad: You mean "darn".

Me: No, I meant shit. Who says darn?

So he stopped. My mom made a valiant effort last night with a lot of "darns" and "goshes" but it was sadly all for naught when she told my dad, after looking at a picture he took of himself, that he looked like someone had "shoved their hand up his ass". Fa la la la la.

• The best part of the night, however, was watching my parents sniff around the house like terriers after my dad smelled something he just couldn't quite place. Every couple of minutes or so my dad would say "I can still smell it! Come here and smell. So, my mom would come over to his chair and smell wherever he was pointing and I would offer suggestions as to what it could possibly be and where it could be coming from. It got to the point where I was just yelling out places to see if they would actually go there and sniff around. Maybe it's outside! Maybe it's in the register! Maybe it's in your moustache! Maybe it's in the bathroom! If you can picture my mom face down on the table, sniffing a grid pattern, and my dad on his hands and knees with his nose down the register, then you've pretty much pictured a typical holiday night with my family.

Fa la la la la..la la LA LA!