Monday, February 23, 2009

Hey I'm back! Hey!

So, I KNOW I haven't posted for a while and I KNOW I really should be posting MORE now that I've moved and am living THE ADVENTURE OF A LIFETIME but I have been BUSY. My brother has A LOT of TV channels and my sister-in-law PVR's EVERYTHING so there is ALWAYS something to watch. It's not MY fault. TV is an addiction.

But seriously folks. I have been doing a lot of things. What kind of things? Well here is a summary of my life's events since I arrived in Oakville, Ontario:

Actually, let's start with before I left. I nicely gave myself a week off after quitting my job so I could get everything done but, instead of doing that, I got sick with some sort of cold and then I got the stomach flu so that was pretty awesome. My mom had to actually go clean my house the day before I left because I couldn't get out of bed. That's how awesome my mom is people. She may do and say some pretty funny things but, when it all comes down to it, she's very terrific.

The day before I got the stomach flu, when I still just had a horrible cold, I got up early to go meet the movers at my place. After waiting a half an hour I got a phone call from them saying they would be 4 hours late. I was pretty happy about that. When they finally arrived, they did very little moving and a lot of just standing around and chatting. So, I left for a while and came back. Then they asked if I could get them a coffee. And, um, maybe not just a coffee but, maybe a french cappuccino? Are you fucking kidding me I said? In my head. And then I went and got the coffee and they sill weren't done. Did I tell you I had all my stuff packed in totes and moved to the front entrance with all the furniture? Even the stuff from upstairs. All of it. Despite this and also despite their fucking princess coffees, it still took them over three hours to move my stuff into their truck. I was truly amazed.

On Valentines Day my brother's family, his in laws, brother in law, brother in law's girlfriend, me and my friend went to a medieval feast. It was pretty cool. Everyone sat in this big stadium and watched this kind of play thing and there was jousting and a princess and horses and an evil villain and everything. The meal was fantastic. It consisted of a half a chicken(no joke), soup, bread, a potato, a rib and a "royal pastry" which we had to eat WITH OUR HANDS. LIKE SAVAGES. It was pretty sweet. And we all got paper Burger King crowns and sat in coloured sections which corresponded with our knight's colour and we all cheered when our knight did stuff and booed when the other knights did stuff. My favourite part was when we had to wait outside in the freezing cold for 45 minutes and then my brother's father-in-law wanted to fight this guy for budding in line and pretty much would have called him on if he wasn't carrying my niece. I think it would have been a pretty decent fight.

I've started a couple more Event Management online classes. This time I'm taking two instead of one because I figured I would be unemployed when they started. I was so right! I am enjoying them more though because I can actually spend more time on them. This isn't to say that I actually AM spending more time on them but in theory I could.

Here's something interesting: I'm 33 years old and currently sleeping in a child size captains bed that leans to one side and has a Winnie the Pooh blanket on it. I really have hit the big time.

The movers finally delivered my stuff yesterday. Only two weeks after picking it up at my house and not really ever knowing where it was when I phoned. Instead of two incompetent hillbillies though, they sent one. So my brother and I got to help unload. We had SO MUCH FUN pretending we were movers! My brother would yell out the numbers and I would mark them off on the sheet. I am so glad I paid almost $4000.00 to basically do everything myself. We did actually do it quicker then the guys who picked my stuff up despite the fact that this guy didn't shut up the whole time he was there and had to take frequent breaks to emphasise various points of his stories. I guess they get lonely though. He was probably pretty happy to be talking to people...with teeth.(I totally stole that last line from my brother and he reads this occasionally so I better give credit where credit is due).

I still miss my dog and I get sad sometimes. But my brother has a dog who is equally neurotic and loses her shit everytime I come into the room so it's almost the same.

The job hunt is going pretty slow. I've probably applied to 7 billion jobs so far, give or take a few. I'm taking the fact that there are still job ads to mean that there are still actual jobs out there so I haven't given up hope yet. Today I went to an employment agency so hopefully I'll get something to tide me over until I've found my dream job. Or a full time job anywhere. Whatever.


Oh, and I've joined a gym! I can't afford food and I'm living at my brother's for free but I can join a gym. It makes perfect sense in my mind. It's actually the best gym I've ever been a member of. The classes are so awesome. I haven't even tried them all yet but the ones I have tried are pretty super fantastic. There's this one that is a Yoga/Tai Chi/Pilates combo class. And a weight lifting class, and a hip-hop/latin dancing class and a martial arts one! And they have free fruit! And sometimes theme nights and prizes! And it's in a Super Store! It's basically the best gym in the world.

Ok, so that's it for now. I live about 30 minutes from Toronto and I have been there a few times but I don't have any money so my time is basically spent looking around and wishing I had money to do stuff. Yesterday I went to that documentary about Hurricane Katrina that was nominated for an Oscar but didn't win. That's kind of what someone would think you would do in Toronto right? Watch a documentary? Yeah. Living the dream baby, living the dream.


May-B said...

All I can say is 'Wow'. Good times, my friend. Good times.

erin said...

i'm not going to have to pee for a week, because i just did, like 30 times in a row.


Shits to your movers though.

I'm sending job-prayers your way!

erin said...

ps---- they must be watching DORA!THE!EXPLORER!

LynnieC said...


You truly ARE living the dream.

PS. I miss you!!!

tee said...

Glad you're back posting!! I've missed your hilarity! When I come visit can I visit your gym? Maybe it'll inspire a move to the big city.

notquiteawake said...

And now this is the part where you all make plans to come visit me because I miss you!