Anyways, here are a few lessons I've learned in the last week or so:
1) There are certain people who can enjoy working in a sales-driven telephone banking job. It turns out that I'm not one of them. I'm not sure if it's the complaining or the being talked down to or the being sworn at or the crying or the sales targets or the extremely regimented quality control that makes me hate it. Oh, no wait. I am sure. It's all of those things. All of those things make me hate it. I think I would be ok if I just had to deal with the first four, but to tie in the aggressive sales targets really seems to have pushed me over the "not entirely enjoying my job" edge. Way over. And I know you're thinking, "Dude, you knew it was a sales job when you went into it didn't you?" And, you're right. I did know. And I made a choice. Basically I chose, rather than working at a job that I sort of liked that was killing my back and knees and didn't pay me enough to live, I would chose a job that did pay me enough to live but, in fact, would slowly start to suck the will to continue with that living right out of me. I think I made the right decision but just barely. Luckily I have my backup plan of having my dream job in Event Planning handed to me immediately after I finish my final project. Phew right?
2) So, I was driving around in the underground parking lot at work the other day and I was about to turn the corner when I noticed a guy coming from the other direction and I was all YOU'RE NOT TAKING MY SPOT so I whipped in front of him and took the next available spot before he could even THINK about getting there and I was like, SUCKER! And then I ran into the wall with my car. Karma is a bitch my friends.
3) The third thing I learned this week was that I can now easily see how people completely lose their minds in gridlock traffic and just jump out of their car and start shooting people. I could actually envision my mind snapping today as I waited for the cars in front of me to move. I don't understand how, with three, and sometimes four, lanes of traffic there are still pockets of the highway where traffic comes to a virtual standstill. No, actually I do understand. It's because many many people driving on the highway should not be driving on the highway. They should be walking. Or taking public transit. They should not be driving. Or, at least, not while I'm driving. Which is a good portion of the day it seems. There needs to be a course or a pamphlet or something that explains the rules of the highway. I could easily teach that course. And it would take all of five minutes. And everyone would have to sign a contract that showed they understood the rules. And then we would all have ice cream. You know, just to show how nice I am, I'm going to give all of you that course free of charge. This is worth it's weight in gold if you're ever planning on doing some highway driving. It will also save me from shooting you if I do happen to lose my mind at some point. Feel free to take notes:
If there are three lanes of traffic, the one on the far right is the slow lane. If you are one of the many many people who like to drive on a major highway at exactly the speed limit(100 km/hr for those who don't know) or under, than feel free to drive in that lane. Feel free to go as slow as you want. I don't care.
HOWEVER, if you choose to go in the middle lane AND LISTEN CAREFULLY, you have to be going at least 110. If you are uncomfortable with that, go back into the slow lane. I don't care if someone in front of you is going 80 and you want to go 100. I don't care. Stay in the slow lane because, technically at 100, you are still a slow person. You're just going to have to deal with that. There is no reason at all why you should be going under 110 in the middle lane. Maybe if you suddenly go blind. Or have a heart attack. Then it's ok.
The lane on the far left is the FAST lane. Fast. You need to go fast in this lane. If you are going under 120 you are not going fast. Change lanes. If I am behind you and you're only going 100 in this lane don't ever stop anywhere because I may get out of my car and hurt you. There is no reason AT ALL why you should be going slower than 120 in this lane. Even if you suddenly go blind or have a heart attack. If this happens to you, just swerve to the right so I can pass you. What ever happens to you after that is in God's hands I guess.
And, speaking of God, Happy Easter everyone!
Best. Segway. Ever.